First time running, looking for feedback on my mission design

Hello World!

It’s my first time posting anything on the forum.
I’ve been playing MG with my wife for some time, but now I’ve come to run a more “normal” game for four players. I’d like to ask for some feedback on what I’ve planned for this session of roughly 4h INCLUDING character creation. That is why I’ve decided to have only one GM and Player Phase each in this session.

This is what I’ve got so far:

Session 0 (Char creation) and Session 1 (shortened adventure)

4 Players

Mission: Escort a Caravan of various supplies to Wildseed! A town that has asked for help after suffering a raid by a gang of mouse bandits.
four Caravans: seeds, seeds, nuts, dried berries

The mayor fears that they are short on supplies before the workers in the community can start to supply the town and their trade by themselves again.
After you’ve escorted the caravans, try to ascertain about the local situation about the mouse bandit gang, possibly reinforcing security.

It is still very early in spring, you are one of the first patrols to leave Lockhaven.

Weather: cold rain and overcast sky. (+1Ob to relevant tests)

Challenges:

  • [ ] First Challenge - Wilderness:
    The paths still have remnants of winter. Muddy conditions, water flowing in and over places from the melting snow, generally wet conditions.

          - [ ] Test: Ob 5 Pathfinder (+1Ob for bad Weather conditions)
    

Twist(s) may include:
- Weather turning to a cold spring snow (Ob 3 Health test)
- A mouse pulling one of the carts is injured, slipping on a wet rock (Ob 3 Healer)
- The carts are stuck in mud. (Ob 3 Laborer +1Ob for bad Weather conditions)

Conditions: Tired, Hungry/thirsty, Angry, Injured, Sick

  • [ ] Second Challenge - Animals
    The Wagons of seeds and nuts have attracted a couple of birds. a starling (vibrant orange chest, blue feathers, dark head and beak) have been following your caravan from a short distance.

          - [ ] Test: Hunter vs Nature 5 (starling)
                       Loremouse vs Ob 3 (feathered beast)
    

Twist(s) may include:
- The starling gains access to three of the four carts before you are able to scare it away. It rattled a bunch of the supplies and broke a wheel of one of the carts! (carpenter Ob 2 +1 for weather)
- the starlings create enough noise to attract other seedeater birds! now theres a whole flock of them! (7 birds - 5+6 = Ob 11)
- the starlings are easily startled. too easily. it was not the mice who scared the birds away! there is a milk snake! (milk snakes are red with black stripes)
Milk Snake Nature 7
Hunter test vs Snake’s Nature

Conditions: Tired, Hungry/thirsty, Angry, Injured, Sick

Player turn

– End of Session –

Let me know about any suggestions, corrections or anything of the sort!

cheers, Cardall